


Your Heart

by Penguiduck



Series: An Expression of Thanks [3]
Category: Kuroshitsuji | Black Butler
Genre: Angst, F/M, Implied Sexual Content, Melancholy, One Shot, One-Sided Relationship, Post-Canon, Raffle, Reader-Insert, request
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-29
Updated: 2019-10-29
Packaged: 2021-01-06 07:27:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,533
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21222821
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Penguiduck/pseuds/Penguiduck
Summary: Sebastian Michaelis thought he wanted your soul.  He worked for it, stood by your side for over two years, serving you to the best of his ability.  But after he fulfilled his end of the contract, he realized he wanted something more.[Reader x Sebastian]For Mei Mei, Winner of the 500 Kudos Flash Raffle!





	Your Heart

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Mei Mei](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=Mei+Mei).

> I'm excited to present the second completed request for my raffle series: [An Expression of Thanks](https://archiveofourown.org/works/20227408/chapters/48579194)
> 
> The winner is Mei Mei with this request: _I'd like to read a fic where in Sebastian finally found his mate (a human). Accidentally. He wasn't even looking or searching for a mate. But there she was. Being protected by his "own powers" when he tried devouring her. A sight that made him realize that she is his appointed mate._
> 
> My interpretation isn't really romantic, per se, but what can I say? I really enjoy angst! ^_^;;; 
> 
> This is my first time writing for Black Butler. I came to the realization that Sebastian Michaelis is not exactly boyfriend material. His front as a loyal butler is only true for as long as the contract holds. Beyond that, he's a self-serving, callous demon who is on the prowl for his next meal. I don't know if he really has the capacity to love, but he is lawful, as far as his alignment goes, and he respects the natural order of things, so I leveraged that part of his nature.
> 
> I left the ending open-ended. You can use your imagination to determine what happens between him and the reader-character, you. 
> 
> If anyone has thoughts, opinions, complaints, I welcome you to leave a comment! I take your feedback to heart.
> 
> Please enjoy! Thanks for reading!

“Well, a dealʼs a deal,” you said, taking a deep breath. You smoothed back your hair, straightening your dress. “I promised you my soul once I found and punished the man responsible for my fiancé’s death.”

Sebastian watched you, a certain hunger in his eyes. They were always like that. They were eager, desirous -- they struck fear in the hearts of any human who dared to look into them.

In some ways, he frightened you. When you first created the contract with him, you were angry and distraught over the tragedy of losing your fiancé. Foolishly, you didn’t think twice about making a pact with a demon. Sebastian was clever -- he caught you at your weakest moment, proposing a predatory offer you couldn’t refuse. He drew the seal of the contract on your body, carving it out in blood right above your chest.

From that moment onward, he was always at your side, a loyal retainer who served you without question.

Yes, he frightened you, but it was not a mortal fear that plagued your heart. You didn’t think he would hurt you, and he certainly couldn’t while the terms of your pact were still in play. He frightened you because you did not know him, the man underneath the fine tail coat, the polished shoes, the pristine white gloves.

He was a demon from another world. You had never been there, nor would you ever be. He was old, having lived for possibly thousands of years. The moments he spent with you, he said, would only be a blip on the timeline.

How could you possibly understand someone who had that sort of perspective? It was like comparing your life to that of an ant. You would never understand them; your empathy was limited, and their lives seemed meaningless to you, though surely they thought they were building a magnificent palace beneath the sands.

Was this the struggle that Sebastian faced?

* * *

“My lady,” he said, bowing deeply before her. 

There was something about her that made him pause. Normally, after his end of a contract was fulfilled, he was eager to prey upon his hard-earned soul. He had hungered for two years at her side, each day watching her, delighting at the taste of her. He could smell it, the succulent, unctuous flavor of her soul -- it would be lucious on his tongue, velvet in texture, sweet with juices spilling from his lips. Each bite would be worth the moments of craving he had faced, the years of practical starvation. He required sustenance. It was the price of being a finicky eater with a refined palate.

Sebastian walked toward her, offering her his hand. “Let us go somewhere more… comfortable.”

She didn’t accept immediately, but she did, placing her delicate hand in his. She was quiet, looking at him with her expressive eyes. There was uncertainty in them, a sprinkling of relief, a touch of fear.

He wanted her soul to be tender, relaxed, perfectly poached in her comfort. Consuming souls when they were wrought with anxiety made them tough, difficult to swallow. He had to prepare them, luring her into a balm of trusting warmth before taking his first bite. It was a challenging task -- many of his prey were unable to fully relax, knowing they were about to be eaten.

But she seemed to be in fair condition, all things considered. She was brave, unlike most humans. She had a strong resolve, unbreakable, fueled not by revenge but by her love for her late fiancé. It was a rare trait she had, this desire for justice, not for herself but for those who surrounded her. 

Humans were… difficult, at best. Sebastian enjoyed their struggles, marveling at how far they would often go to achieve their grandiose ambitions, often at the cost of others. He watched them, slipping through the darkness to find the most delectable souls. They usually belonged to the desperate, the ones who were bound to rake themselves across broken glass in order to succeed in their trials for revenge or greed. 

His lady wasn’t like them. She did not fear the prospect of death.

In fact, he thought she might have welcomed it, having lost the man she loved to a terrible twist of fate.

Perhaps that was why her soul was so delicate, assuming an exquisite flavor he never had the opportunity to sample before. He could smell her, the flowering aroma, like a tree that bore the most luxurious fruits. The very thought of biting into his harvest made his mouth water.

He had been waiting for this day for far too long.

* * *

You followed Sebastian as he led you through the manor, stepping over the fallen corpses of your enemies. He made short work of them.

Death was no longer of consequence to you. Your fiancé suffered an unjust death, and you did not think there was anything in the world that would put his tumultuous soul at ease unless you silenced those who killed him. It was not an act of vengeance as many would believe -- it was to ensure that no one else would be affected by this evil again.

Sebastian helped you into the carriage, and he stepped into the front seat, sending the horses along their way. 

It was dark with only the moon and starlight as your guide. It would be a decent ride home, the chill of the wind cut by the warm shawl on your back. 

You watched after him, the handsome man he had disguised himself as. It seemed unfair that Sebastian took this form, his dashing good looks the subject of much discussion in your hometown. They gossiped about you, wondering why you would trust him at your side more so than a handmaid. Still, women loved him, his polite nature, his willingness to serve. 

You knew him better than that. In reality, he was dark, sadistic, and rather callous -- it was of no consequence to you, as you simply needed a job done. A deal with the devil was going to hurt, and you knew what you were getting yourself into. He informed you of the rules and creation of contracts, and you determined your terms. He agreed to them.

He drove past the cemetery, and you looked longingly in that direction, watching the mists roam over the vast expanse of headstones.

The carriage stopped. “Would my lady like to bid her fiancé goodbye?” he asked.

This was a true kindness, perhaps his first. Everything else was contractual. You looked at Sebastian, his brilliant red eyes. He had fulfilled his end of the bargain, and, yet, he was willing to allow you this final moment with the one you loved most. 

You nodded. “If it wouldn’t be too much trouble,” you said. “It won’t take more than a few minutes.”

“Then, we shall go.” He guided the horses down the cobblestone path, their hooves clipping methodically with each step.

He helped you out of the carriage, and you paced toward your fiancé’s headstone. You couldn’t see the text in the dark, but you knew this was his. You had been here on many occasions. You knelt in the cool grass, paying no mind as the moisture seeped through your dress on this cold night. It wouldn’t matter soon, anyhow.

The only thing you regretted was not being able to spend the rest of eternity with him. Your soul belonged to a demon now. After he consumed it, you would cease to exist.

That couldn’t be so bad, right? If you didn’t exist, you wouldn’t know what you were missing.

But he would.

You closed your eyes, remembering the fond memories you shared with your fiancé. You remembered the gala where you met, where you first caught his eye. You remembered the courtship, his constant love notes and gifts of flowers. You remembered his proposal, an untraditional method by to earn a lady’s hand in this day and age, but he was bold and charmed your family all the same.

Lost in your thoughts, you found the tears rolling down your cheeks, though you did not brush them away. They felt as though they belonged there.

“My lady,” Sebastian said. “I apologize for interrupting, but you’ll catch your death out here.” He handed you a handkerchief. “Dry your eyes.”

You accepted his gift, dabbing away the tears. Only more came.

After a few moments, as promised, you stood. “I’m ready, Sebastian,” you said.

“Lay these first,” he instructed, offering you a small bouquet of flowers.

You had no idea how he got them in such a short period of time, but you knew better than to question his methods. “Thank you.” You took them, cradling them close to your heart, letting the soft petals brush against your face. There were primroses and calendulas, flowers your fiancé had once given you. You sighed and placed them at the headstone. “Goodbye,” you whispered for the final time.

* * *

Sebastian returned you home, stoking the fires in your bedroom and instructing your maid to draw a warm bath for you. 

You bathed, letting the stress of today wash away, changed into you night gown, and went to bed, feeling a deep melancholy in your heart. 

“Sebastian,” you said, calling out to the man as he finished lighting the candles.

“Yes, my lady?” 

“I wish you'd just get this over with. I don't understand why you're going to all this trouble.” 

“You wish to die sooner?” 

“It's not that.” You turned onto your side, looking at him.

“Is it because you're afraid? Do I frighten you?” His eyes gleamed in the shallow lightning. 

You shook your head. “No. Sebastian, I know it sounds ridiculous. You're only here because of our contract. You have no reason to help me otherwise. But during these past two years, somehow I've come to think of you as a friend.” 

“Is that so? I am flattered.” 

“Do you have use for friends? I'm not sure demons do.” 

He was quiet. 

“I suppose I shouldn't assume either. I'm sorry. But to answer your question, I'm not frightened by you right now. I've known what would happen for a long time. I've accepted it.”

“All in due time, my lady,” he said as he kneeled by your bedside, his gloved hand running gently across your cheek.

“What are you waiting for?” 

“For you to fall asleep. It'll be less painful for you this way. You won't even realize it.” 

You couldn't help but smile at him. “Is this what you do for everyone before you devour their souls?” 

“No, my lady. Just you.” 

You shut your eyes. “Very well, then. I'll try to sleep. Will you play for me? Your violin? I think it'll help.” 

“Of course, my lady. Your wish is my command.” 

He fetched his violin and began to play. As soon as the bow touched the strings, singing its wistful melody, your body relaxed beneath the feather-soft comfort of the sheets and duvet. The music filled your heart, gently lulling you to a deep sleep.

* * *

Sebastian licked his lips. It was time. Her soul had become most tender, the scent of its sweet aroma drifting toward him, luring him closer to his prey. 

He hovered over her, letting the gnawing of his hunger seep in. The hungrier he was, the better she would taste. He touched her face, tilting her chin up. She was fast asleep, unaware of his presence. He usually enjoyed it when his meals were awake for the feast, but his years of servitude had endeared her to him. He did not wish to see the fear in her eyes that he fought off these past two years. 

She amused him. She was a woman in a man's world, and she stood tall and proud. She ran the manor with a firm but fair hand. Her servants loved her and would no doubt follow her to the ends of the earth. They couldn't follow her where she was going tonight, but they would surely mourn her death. 

They would pray for her soul. Little did they know how futile it would be. Her soul would be no more, devoured, and in the pits of a demon’s vast stomach.

Sebastian remembered the first time they had met. She summoned him in her grief. She did not know about the existence of demons, but the devastating loss of her fiancé was enough to draw in the supernatural. Sebastian was certainly interested enough to appear, to offer her a contract in which they both would benefit. 

He began to work his dark magic, coaxing her soul forward, beckoning it to come forth and leave its carnal home behind. Slowly, it emerged from her chest, a glimmering force that seemed to pulse as it appeared in the evening light. It looked delectable to him, and he stared after it as it floated in the air in much the same way as a starving man might look at a banquet. He feasted with his eyes first, the beautiful soul like a plated course of sustenance and pleasure, a masterpiece. 

He reached for it, holding the delicate soul in his hands. If he was not gentle, it would crumble -- it even looked different, clearer, crisper, than other souls he consumed in the past. Sebastian breathed it in, inhaling its scent, the delicious fragrance that enraptured his senses. 

Fangs bared, he leaned in to take that first juicy bite, only to feel a resistance in his body, a shock jolting through his mind. It was like a zap of electricity, a warning in his core. He released the soul, her soul, watching it float for a moment, trying to aimlessly find its way back into her body. 

What happened? He tried again, no longer feeling that aching hunger -- this time, he was just curious. The soul fluttered as he neared, entrancing him, drawing him to it, promising to quell a desire in him that was more than the beastial craving. He felt a warm sensation in his heart -- or where his heart would be, if he had one. Whatever magic, supernatural or otherwise, that made demons what they were, determined their very nature, prevented him from devouring this soul.

Sebastian finally understood. He released it, letting it sink back into her chest, and he watched her sleep, her breathing evening again as the soul settled.

She opened her eyes, her lashes quivering in the dim light. “What happened?” she asked, sitting up in bed, propped up by the plush pillows behind her. “Sebastian? Why didn’t you take my soul?”

He placed his index finger on her lips. “My lady, it seems that I cannot.”

She gave him a taunting glance. “Don’t tell me you’ve gotten soft. Like I said, a deal’s a deal. My soul is yours.”

“I no longer want your soul.”

“Then what is it you want? What can I possibly give you?”

He came closer, so close that their noses nearly touched. She felt his breath on her skin, saw the glowing red eyes that seemed to see through her. “I want your heart,” he whispered, the first note in the symphony of the night.

**Author's Note:**

> Comments are greatly appreciated! <3
> 
> Follow me on [Tumblr](https://penguiduck.tumblr.com/) for updates and insight on my writing process!


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